ONE DOOR AWAY FROM HEAVEN (Dean Koontz) - May 18/13

Damn, what a crazy ordeal this was. I have officially had it with Dean Koontz. (Well, I still own two books, but once I read those, me and him are done professionally.) This incredibly, insanely interminable book takes a story that could've MAYBE filled 50 pages and trudges along for an almost insane 681 pages! (With small print, no less!) I can't believe how much time Koontz wastes on stuff the reader couldn't POSSIBLY care less about, and it's worth noting that even with this extreme length, ALL of the characters remain underdeveloped and underwhelming. I just didn't care about any of these people. (They're just so QUIRKY. There's not an authentic figure in the bunch.) Jesus, what a terrible, terrible book. Koontz, you suck. * out of ****